My Mother thought I should learn to play piano when I was very young. She also thought I should be a legal secretary. That’s what girls did when they grew up, and that’s pretty much it, no discussion.
My Mother was also my first and biggest bully. Writer, Merrill Markoe, was raised by a mother similar to mine and she described it like being raised by your own private heckler.
My goal was not legal secretary, my goal was simply to keep my head down, stay out of trouble, and get out as soon as possible. I was out on my own in a hurry.
Married and Pregnant at 17, I showed her who’s boss. “They” said teenage marriages wouldn’t last and I spent 10 years trying to prove “them” wrong.
I was exhausted. Being a single mom seemed much easier.
It took one more disastrous marriage of 10 years before I finally learned lessons I should have learned a long time ago, but boundaries and self esteem are hard to come by and some time are the toughest lessons to be learned.
That being said, I’ve been married to the right, Mr. Right for 22 years now.
Third times a charm!
I spent the bulk of my career in Non Profit Administration. My personality type clearly states I do better when I have a cause. Non Profit did this for me. I felt I was doing something that mattered.
At the end of my career I also felt Non Profit Administration was getting to be much like my family …similar to the dysfunction I felt each time I stepped into my office.
I knew it was time for me to find something else to do so when we moved out of State that was my opportunity. I could be anybody I wanted to be.
I tried my hand at the typical retirement jobs and it really is hard to go from being in charge one day to reporting to someone who is the younger than your children the next day.
I had forgotten to plan for what was next.
When I finally settled on not working it was a genuine relief. Now I just had to find a cause.
That’s when Lee and I started talking about writing. We still had so much to give. I just wanted to do it on my terms.
We’ve been moving around the country for years now. Retirement is comfortable and I’m no longer looking for a cause.
I like writing for middleSage, it gives me a chance to tell a story uninterrupted.